I’m sorry, you can’t say “Dick Van Dyke.”

I’m sorry, you can’t say “Dick Van Dyke.”

Comcast’s Xfinity X1 Voice Remote is state-of-the-art cable TV tech, allowing subscribers to speak complex commands to the cable box. Not only can you ask it to fast-forward, pause and rewind, it can also scour the cable guide for movies and shows. But there is one glitch: Two users confirmed that the remote gets snippy when asked to play episodes of The Dick Van Dyke Show. It says, “Sorry, I cannot handle commands with that type of language.” (Commands for “Dick Van Dyke” are now able to be completed after the problem was discovered, according to an Xfinity spokesperson.)

Violence is not a good thing…except maybe in this case. Fox News says a Charlotte, North Carolina kidnapper was trying to force a woman into his car when she broke free and ran into a martial arts studio. The kidnapper followed her in before head instructor Randall Ephraim asked him to leave. The kidnapper started swinging, before Randall got him out of the studio and basically pounded him into the ground.

And finally,

NBC claims the New York police have arrested a 32 year-old woman for enrolling in high school and pretending to be a 15 year-old teen. Michaelann Goodrich told school officials her name was ‘Riley Madison’. She attended one day of classes before getting busted. School officials called the police after they suspected Goodrich was lying. She gave no reason for her dishonesty.